Meeting the Slow Holler Tarot has been quite a ride. This deck is already metaphorically cracking my ribs open a bit so I felt it would behoove me to cast a deck interview spread to explore our working relationship. The words in italics are from the Slow Holler LWB.
Invest in your heart today.
Take the time for actions that nourish and sweeten your heart. Eat well, drink some hawthorn tea, connect with a loved one, hold some rose quartz, rub a drop of honey on your heart, receive a great big hug.
Take time for your heart.
1. What calls attention to my [specific chakra/energy center/focal point/circumstance] at this time? MOTHER OF SEAS [reversed] – With this part of myself on low power, it is hard for me to see where I’m going or even trying to go. Moreover, I’m unable to see myself as worthy, capable, confident for what I need to do. My perception is being skewed by what everyone else is thinking of me. Over-reliance on what others see, good and bad, means that I cannot move for myself, acknowledge for myself. It’s been a while since I’ve been here, but I understand that my solar plexus chakra is my life’s work in as much as it is the heart of my healing practice. I give to others, what do I leave for my own healing?
2. What do I need to breathe out to unblock the flow of positive energy? LILITH (Power – The Emperor). My birth card always comes through when things are crucial. I’m a bit pained that it showed up in the part of the spread I need to release, but then again there’s always been a side to this card that clearly defined my shadow aspects. Where the rigidity, pride, and stubbornness of The Emperor left me moving from the place of my lowest vibration. She shows up in this spread on her side, not a place of power but more of surrender. I’ve just let things happen to me for too long, but I also need to very carefully evaluate what exactly it is that I need to stop happening to allow for what I want to happen… scratch that, what I need to do to make it happen, this is about strength of will after all.
3. What do I need to breathe in to encourage the flow of positive energy? MAIDEN OF WIND (CLARITY) [reversed] – This spread is so much about seeing and knowing in a different way. Inverted, the art of Maiden of Wind is all about the fierce golden eagle ancestor guide. What might it mean to see through the eagle and not my just rely on my own aim? Recently, with startling frequency, I’m being asked to look outside of my narrow view and see with the eyes of those wiser, older, ancestor. Not an easy thing with my control issues, but that’s part of the release my birth card came to warn me about.
4. What additional guidance is there to invite balance and stability of flow? SEVEN OF FIRE (Courage) – It’s interesting that the image normally found in STRENGTH is showing up instead in this suit. Except here, the lion and the maiden aren’t on the same side. A different kind of strength is called for, it’s courage. I can’t help but feel like the lion and the maiden are the same being, just trying to find their way to evolving up to the Strength card. Confronting inner demons, as it were, inner shadows, facing up and forward. The hardest work but equally the most rewarding.
Haven’t I been here before?
I pulled the 10 of Disks from the Motherpeace Tarot with a question marking my current space in spiritual health. As much as I was the mother giving birth, I am the child being birthed.
We cycle back and forth through our healing, often healing the same spaces over and over. Perhaps it is that we have to peel the hurt and harm back, layer after layer, and it takes a while before we can come back. Sometimes it’s even that we grew back our layers of hurt and harm and yeah, we do the work over.
Not that it’s hopeless. Anyone paying attention to nature shows that it isn’t so. We shed to renew. This and that layer, and our current skin sustains as until it doesn’t, until it no longer serves us and then back to peeling we go. I won’t pretend that at times it isn’t an ugly, disgusting, sometimes even painful process- and the fresh layer is often raw, exposed, but it is our sacred growth cycle.
And when we settle into our skin we are radiant, renewed, and beautiful.
This full moon in Pisces, Yemaya & Oshun called me to the brackish waters, where river meets ocean, where the separation of the two waters is proven false. What is to be found at this union of saltwater and freshwater? What is released and taken in. Brackish waters get a bad rap… but there’s healing to be found there too!
This reading is dedicated to these two mothers who hold me close at the union of this full circle supermoon.
Even before I begin, the Queen of Stones (Wands) jumps out to oversee the proceedings.
1. Things to let go of:
THE FOOL: the ultimate jump and let go card shows up to salute me in my coming new journey. She carries a lotus sack, which to me tells of an open heart. I’m comforted by that image despite the rather striking serpent waiting for the mouse. But hey, there’s every chance she jumps far enough to miss the serpent entirely.
2. Things to keep:
KING OF BLOOMS: Yeye O! Oshun’s capacity for highest and transformative love is my first instinct. Mirrored by Yemaya’s second showing in this spread in the Queen of Blooms (please note that I don’t hold to the Queen/King hierarchy when I draw these connections; Oshun & Yemaya are sisters who share quite a bit- meeting at the brackish waters).
3. Things yet to come
KING OF STONES: Another King/Queen mirror, the Queen of Stones had already jumped in the mix. Come through Pisces Moon! Fruition of creativity, peak creation and vitality. I love it. This is also a very Oshun energy for me. I’m loving this spread already.
4. How the world affects you
THE HERMIT (reverse): Oh dear, it draws me outside of myself, and pulls me from center. Gotta watch this. This echoes a message I received just yesterday. Upside down, the hibernating bear looks buried instead of cradled. There’s something to that.
5. What to give
QUEEN OF BLOOMS: I need to sit with what Yemaya is asking of me to release/share some more. I hear share a lot though. A giving of myself- in balance… not so much that I forget to nurture and self-mother. The part of me that is a teacher, for self and others. Also in alignment for my new journey.
6. What to receive
THREE OF BONES (reverse): Oh, the Bones suit in this deck can be such a struggle sometimes with how bare it is in comparison to all the others. In consideration of the more traditional meanings, there’s something here about breaking off and treading a new path on my own for a while. That lower bone leaving the other two with the little mushrooms (that look like little houses) bloomed on it. There’s a reason that the only other imbalance comes from The Hermit in reverse. Which rather practically matches where I’m at, leaving found family to go off to a city where I’ll be on my own.
7. What to learn
SIX OF PLUMES: Release what no longer serves you at the brackish waters, and sail off (in whatever direction, to river or ocean) to a new beginning.
I’m in Cali, doing some deep internal work. Pulled a spread to be aware of what I’m into for this experience.
1. What am I here for in this moment?
Ace of Fire – Illumination: in this particular moment, for this journey I am in search of my fire, my wisdom, myself really. The figure in this image is lot from within and lighting outward into the world. Her eyes are far off, always seeking, but her truth is such that the search always leads back to herself where the truth always had been.
2. What are my challenges?
The Chariot – Athena: A balance of control. Athena as goddess of war and wisdom, holds both in balance. Unnecessary hostility, competition, etc has served me very little and lost me my insight. However, on the other hand, wisdom does not necessarily mean an inability to defend yourself. Be aware of myself in order to manifest boundaries as necessary but dismiss the unnecessary wars in my life, internal and external.
3. How to address those challenges?
Five of Earth – Manipulation: This was a bit difficult to parse, but the more I thought about it the more it came to me that self doubt is its own kind of manipulation – one manifested by both self and others. An inability to see ones own truth can impact how easily we are led to feel less than.
4. Clarification of card #3
Mother of Seas – Perception: I asked for clarification and it was basically this. Wise Mother Yemaya looks into her shell and sees the truth of self and others. Her perception is one of clarity and knowledge. And she likes what she sees! Do I? My reflection will never show true by other people’s measures and mirrors. It’s about time to look at myself and see me as I am, and smile with love and forgiveness as I begin to overcome the shade of others misconceptions of me. Only I can truly conceive of my highest good.
Giving thanks to the mothers, Orisha and ancestral for such an informed reading.